


sunrises and sunsets

by cashtonkink



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Bittersweet, M/M, Memories, Mild Sexual Content, bitch i'm SAD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-25
Updated: 2019-04-25
Packaged: 2020-01-31 15:06:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18593743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cashtonkink/pseuds/cashtonkink
Summary: a sunrise symbolizes a new beginning, the dawn of a memory completely blank, ready to be imprinted on with words and actions the two of them had yet to think of.a sunset symbolizes the end. harry wasn't ready for the end.





	sunrises and sunsets

**Author's Note:**

> keep an eye out for the foreshadowing moments of louis being a Bad Boyfriend 
> 
> idk what inspired this but i hope you like it

never before had a sunset affected harry so deeply. it burnt it's way into his mind, engraining the view into the back of his eyelids, making him unable to see anything but the beautiful sky, turning shades of purple, orange, and pink. the sprawling river in front of him reflected the sunset off of it, and harry felt kind of trapped as he sat on a bench overlooking the scene. he didn't know exactly why this sunset affected him so much, why it made itself known as a phenomena, existing only to follow harry around, engulfing every thought in the visual. yeah, he didn't know exactly why, but he had a clue. this was his first sunset without louis.

_harry remembers seeing louis for the first time, a boy transfixed in a piece of literature, curled in a ball in a giant recliner, in the furthest corner of the library. harry wasn't exactly one to read a lot, but something compelled him to ask what book was captivating him so. the boy hadn't even noticed him walk up, and a clearing of the throat was the only thing to alert the boy of harry's presence. the boy looked up at harry confusedly, and harry immediately forced something out to lower the amount of awkwardness in the air. "hi, i'm harry. you looked really... lost in that book? i was just wondering if it was something you would want to recommend to someone looking for a good book." the boy smiled, scooted over, and patted the space next to him. "i can read to you if you'd like?"_

_at that moment, harry couldn't think of anything better._

harry felt fabric pressing at his wrist, tried his hardest not to look at it, but eventually caved. it was a woven bracelet, with one side sporting an L, and one side sporting an H. louis made it for him about four months after they'd made themselves quietly official. that was one of the things harry loved so much about louis: he didn't want to make a scene, matching the calm, shy aura of the boy he often shared the bed with. however, there was no scene to be made anymore. harry untied the bracelet and threw it into the river, wishing he could undo the action the second the bracelet left his fingertips.

_"i made you something, haz." louis said, shyly. quietly. harry turned to his boyfriend with a smile. "close your eyes, yeah?" harry did as he was told, letting louis grab a wrist, tying something soft but rough around it. "open 'em." harry opened his eyes, seeing a beautiful woven bracelet containing an L on one side, and an H on the other. harry began to tear up, knowing how much time louis spent on this, putting thought, dedication, and love into an item that would probably never leave his wrist. he kissed louis, gently, tenderly, as if to give him all the thanks he could not convey with words. louis pulled away and smiled, going back to his book. harry curled up to his side again, reading along._

he felt louis tie the bracelet around his wrist. and then he felt fingers trailing down his neck. his chest. his stomach. the phantom press of soft fingers was making harry remember all sorts of once pleasant memories, and yet louis was gone, and harry still felt his touch on the park bench. he couldn't help but think about the first time they'd been truly intimate, eight months in, on harry's birthday. louis had nothing left to give him. now harry wanted to give louis everything back. 

_harry was laid out on the sofa in louis' apartment, stretching his legs to feel the blood in his ears start to yell at him. louis had risen and left about five minutes ago with only a "be right back," and harry already felt cold without his presence on the couch with him. he received a text from louis, reading "come into the bedroom, love." harry lifted himself off the couch, pocketing his phone, and walked to the bedroom. when he opened it, he saw louis, naked except for a pair of briefs, laid out on the bed. the lights were out and candles were lit. "i couldn't think of anything to get you except for all of me, haz. i hope this is to your liking."_

_harry slowly climbed on the bed, taking his pants and shirt off. he looked up louis' legs, his chest, and his neck, up to his face, where he enveloped louis in a hug. he broke it apart, saying only "boundaries?" louis replied a simple "nope." harry kissed him, lowering his hips to meet louis', resulting in a moan of pleasure from both boys. harry kissed down louis' neck, stomach, and torso, burying his face into louis' brief-clad crotch. he lowered the briefs, paused to clarify what he was about to do (which louis followed with a "i would hope so, seeing as you're teasing me”), and began to suck the boy's dick. he used his hand to cover what he could not get, and used his other hand to touch louis' balls, rendering the older boy spineless, moaning quietly into the pillow he draped over his face. louis took harry's mouth for a few minutes, before putting his hands in the boy's hair and gently holding harry's head down while he came, silently moaning through it. harry swallowed it all, making sure to clean his dick before slowly taking his mouth off of it. he didn't even care that louis left him hard, he just cuddled up against the pillows while louis cleaned himself off. he fell asleep before louis could come back. happy birthday to him._

the sky was beginning to darken, but he couldn't get the image of the vivid sky out of his head. the dying colors made him think about the end of his relationship, just a few days prior to his excursion to the bench overlooking the river, but two years after he met the boy in the library. he thought he saw the bracelet floating downstream, but he figured it was just his imagination. 

_"harry, i wanted to talk to you." harry perked his head up. louis sat, meekly, in the same recliner from the library, a gift from harry to louis on his birthday, where he was feet away from an outstretched harry on the sofa. "what is it, love?" louis gulped, fidgeting with the sleeves on his hoodie. "i think we should break up." harry sat up now, eyebrows furrowing, heart racing. "lou." harry offered, small and sad. "did i do something wrong? was it the flowers i got you for valentine's day? i wanted to get you more, but i jus' didn't have the-" louis sniffled, but his eyes were dry. "i thought about this for a while. i'm sorry i didn't tell you sooner. i need some time to collect my thoughts, so i would really like to be alone in my house for right now." harry cringed. it wasn't their house anymore. it wasn't harryandlouis'. it was louis'. the younger boy got up, began to walk, but retraced his steps back to the recliner he met the boy in. there were tears falling now, sadness thickening the younger boy's voice. "lou, i love you. i'm sorry for whatever i did. i love you so much." louis darted his eyes from the door to harry, hoping harry would take the message. harry ignored the looks from louis, and reached for louis' hand. a tear fell onto louis' legs, exposed from his shorts riding up. louis retracted his hand. "please go."_

_harry went. louis never told him why, although harry reasoned that the older boy probably didn't owe him an explanation. it was okay._

it was dark now. however, he still couldn't get the sunset out from behind his eyes. he couldn't fish the bracelet out of the river. he couldn't begin to cease the phantom fingertips grazing his skin. he couldn't help but feel like all the time he'd spent on louis was a waste. he couldn't bring himself to believe that it was a waste to begin with. he couldn't stop imagining why louis would break things off one winter night, leaving harry to drive home heartbroken, tears blurring his vision, and never giving him so much as a shadow of a reason. he couldn't believe that that was how _they_ ended. 

yeah, that's probably why the sunset affected him so much.


End file.
